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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23821774">100% A Real Couple</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/soul_writerr/pseuds/soul_writerr'>soul_writerr</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Law &amp; Order: SVU</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon Compliant, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Flirting, Humor, Inspired by the New York ban on Uber pools unless you're a "real couple", M/M, Uber</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 16:14:20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,313</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23821774</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/soul_writerr/pseuds/soul_writerr</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“Do you think anybody would believe we’re a couple?,” Barba asked.</p>
<p>“You think you can look like someone who’d be willing to slum it?”</p>
<p>“Why am I the one slumming it? You’re young, fit, handsome--,” he stopped himself suddenly, and Sonny beamed at him.</p>
<p>“You think I’m handsome?”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Rafael Barba/Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr.</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>187</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>April 2020 Barisi Bingo</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>100% A Real Couple</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I had no idea what to do with this prompt until I saw it as an opportunity for some flirting and now that this is done I can say: BARISI BINGO!!!!</p>
<p>Enjoy ;)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Counselor,” Sonny spotted Barba on the sidewalk as soon as he walked out of the building; the ADA’s face was pinched as he typed furiously into his phone. “I thought you’d left like 20 minutes ago.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>trying</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” he replied in an exasperated tone. “But the drivers keep cancelling on me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sonny chuckled. “That happens sometimes when they recognize the address. You never know what you’re going to pick up outside a police precinct, right?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Barba threw him an unimpressed side-glance. “Right.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In a placating gesture, Sonny lifted his phone. “Mine’s coming. You wanna split it?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I thought you had a car.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sonny shook his head at himself, looking up and down the empty street. “Yeah, I thought with all that’s going on traffic would be hell and I wouldn’t have anywhere to park, so I took the subway in.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>This time Barba whipped around to look at him with an unnerved expression. “You took the </span>
  <em>
    <span>subway</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know, I know, the Captain gave me a dressing down for it already, Counselor, don’t waste your breath. Won’t be happening again.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Barba mumbled something under his breath that Sonny couldn’t quite make out, but that he suspected were a few choice words about his irresponsible choice of transport at a time like this.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thank you for your offer, Detective, but as you know the Mayor signed an order banning multiple riders unless you’re family or a couple,” Barba huffed. “A ‘real’ couple, as he put it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ah come on Counselor, we’ve been together all day yesterday and today, we had lunch together and all, we’re practically family.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>To Sonny’s surprise, Barba laughed. “Practically family? I don’t think so, Carisi.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He shrugged. “We could pretend to be a couple, then.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Barba’s eyes snapped up to him. “What?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You said family and </span>
  <em>
    <span>real couples</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Carisi, family or couples mean people who live in the same house. I’m not even going home, I have a meeting.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Suit yourself,” Sonny showed Barba his phone again. “He’s two minutes away.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sonny knew Barba would cave; the ADA had said his goodbyes to the squad almost half an hour ago because he did have a meeting with the DA and a few other colleagues before he could call it a day and start enjoying his weekend.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>If his calculations were correct, Barba was already late.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you think anybody would believe we’re a couple?,” Barba asked after a few beats, pocketing his phone.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You think you can look like someone who’d be willing to slum it?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why am </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> the one slumming it? You’re young, fit, handsome--,” he stopped himself suddenly, and Sonny beamed at him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You think I’m handsome?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“If you’re into the boy-next-door type, I guess,” Barba murmured, but it was out there now, and Sonny couldn’t hold back his giddiness. “Didn’t you say two minutes?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Guess he took a wrong turn,” he replied flippantly.  “And please Counselor, you’re the one looking all important and distinguished in your nice three-piece suit with your leather briefcase and silk tie. Besides, you’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>way </span>
  </em>
  <span>hotter than me.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Barba gaped at him, blinking owlishly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sonny spotted a car turning around the corner just then, slowing down, and he flashed Barba a lopsided grin. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Here he comes, Barba,” Sonny said, taking a step closer. “Are we doing this or not?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fine,” Barba said, reached for Sonny, then hesitated.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Just before his driver spotted them, Sonny crowded Barba and slid an arm around his waist, pulling him in. “Don’t be so stiff, Counselor.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Apologies, Detective,” he said through gritted-teeth, then rested a tense hand on Sonny’s shoulder. “It’s not every day I have to make heart eyes at a co-worker.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Good thing I’ve got a few months of practice, then,” Sonny said as the car stopped beside them. “Follow my lead.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The driver lowered his window halfway and looked between the two of them. “Sonny?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s me,” he said. “And this is my boyfriend Rafael. We’re dropping him at One Hogan Place, is that alright? I’ll tip you double the rate.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The driver looked at Rafael long and hard, and Sonny tightened his arm around him a little more. Barba seemed to kick back into gear and turned to look at Sonny with a smile that was </span>
  <em>
    <span>so fond </span>
  </em>
  <span>he almost believed it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I told him there’s no need, but he insists,” Barba said, still looking at Sonny. “All the other drivers kept cancelling on me.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The driver snorted. “Yeah, this isn’t a very popular pick-up place. Get in.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The fact that Sonny’s badge was on full display probably helped them, but he’d rather pretend it was their acting skills that convinced the driver - even though Sonny wasn’t acting much.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They climbed into the Uber and Sonny kept a hold of Rafael’s hand </span>
  <em>
    <span>just in case</span>
  </em>
  <span>, and the ADA looked between their hands and Sonny with a calculating look. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You want to elaborate on what you said?,” Barba asked, and Sonny raised an eyebrow at him. “About how I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>way hotter </span>
  </em>
  <span>than you?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sonny shrugged. “Just the truth, Counselor. I’m very </span>
  <em>
    <span>regular</span>
  </em>
  <span> looking, with the blue eyes and pale face. You’re much more appealing.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re not </span>
  <em>
    <span>regular looking, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Carisi,” Barba huffed, rolling his eyes. “You look like a damn Prince Charming.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He turned to Barba, surprised. “You really think so?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ve already said you’re handsome, stop fishing.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They sat in silence for a few minutes, each watching New York fly by their respective windows, but not mindless of the fact that their hands still laid clasped together on the seat between them.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sonny considered everything that had transpired from the moment he’d left the precinct to now, sitting beside Barba with a door of opportunity banged open - Christ, a door and every single possible window, actually. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He knew it’d be stupid of him to let Barba climb out of this car and up the courthouse steps like nothing happened, so Sonny turned to look at him again and said, hopeful, “Should we do something about this?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“About what?,” Barba turned, face unreadable.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You think I’m handsome, I think you’re hot. Wanna have dinner?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Barba blinked at him then laughed, shaking his head amusedly. “You know what I just said about you being Prince Charming? I take it back, you’re too blunt.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sonny grinned at him. “Come on Counselor, you know </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>is my true charm.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Barba hummed his agreement, then looked down at their hands with the same fond look he’d given Sonny on the sidewalk. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We’re here,” the driver said suddenly, and Sonny hadn’t even realized that the car had stopped. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Barba checked his watch. “Jesus,” he hissed, then grabbed the door handle. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Barba, wait,” Sonny said urgently, his hold on Barba’s hand tightening. “I could take my car and come pick you up after your meeting.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why would you do that?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Uh. Solidarity during this difficult time?,” Sonny said, sounding too damn eager, like always.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Barba smirked at him. “Does your show of solidarity come with a nice meal and a glass of wine, perhaps?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“A whole bottle, if you’d like,” he smirked back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Tempting,” Barba squeezed his hand then let it go, opening the door. “Call me in an hour and we’ll see.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sonny waved his goodbyes, giddy. “Good luck with McCoy.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The last thing Sonny heard before the door closed behind the ADA was Barba’s painfully loud grunt. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The driver put the car on first and exited slowly, giving Sonny more than enough time to watch Barba go all the way up the stairs in hurried steps, already pulling his phone out.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just so you know,” the driver started after they got back into traffic. “I didn’t buy that act for a second, but I’m glad you two figured yourselves out.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sonny met his eyes in the rearview mirror and burst out laughing.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In his pocket, Sonny’s phone pinged with a new text. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I leave at 7pm. Don’t be late.</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Alright I still have one more for the prompt bingo before it closes, it should probably be up on monday! But let me know what you think of this !!</p>
<p>Don't forget to leave some kudos since ao3 is still not adding views from unregistered users ))): pwease!</p>
<p>PS: that last line was a tip of the hat to my lovely IncorrectBarisi mods on twitter MWAH yall are too good to me</p></blockquote></div></div>
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